spring always follows winter

Boy I can't wait :)

monkish

Here's a few quotes about solitude...

"We can cultivate an inner solitude and silence that sets us free from loneliness and fear. Loneliness is inner emptyiness. Solitude is inner fulfillment."

"One who wants fellowship without solitude plunges into the void of words and feelings, and one who seeks solitude without fellowship perishes in the abyss of vanity, self-infatuation, and despair."

"When we speak of ourselves and are filled with ourselves, we leave silence behind. When we repeat the intimate words of God that he has left within us, our silence remains intact."

Pilgramaging St. John of the Cross' Dark Night of the Soul...

"It (dark night of the soul) is an experience to be welcomed much as a sick person might welcome a surgery that promises health and well-being. The purpose of the darkness is not to punish or to afflcit us. It is to set us free."

"The dark night is one of the ways God brings us into a hush, a stillness so that he may work in inner transformation upon the soul."

"Recognize the dark night for what it is. Be grateful that God is lovingly drawing you away from every distraction so that you ccan see him clearly. Rather than chafing and fighting, become still and wait."

It's a reality that permeated my heart yesterday night and echoes again today.

Words that I needed to hear.

Thanks for speaking to me Lord... never stop...

May it find you well,

applications wanted

I sit here enjoying my ice cream sandwich from the Terra Nova Dairy Queen on Westminster Highway in Richmond (there's my subtle plug!) thinking about how unbusy I am and how freeing it is.

Been contemplative of late... affirms that I'm not that shallow. Thankfully!

So occupied the last year I've learned that I've neglected a lot of things in life. This year I feel like I've been "disciplined" by my Father. Got to the point where I almost went monk/nun--just eliminating many things out (heck I was about to do something drastic with my hair too!).

Is it worth it--being so busy? At what cost? At whose expense? My own wholeness? The relationships around me?

Doing ministry is great. I love it. But is that where my worth is coming from? Part of the Lord's discipline is reminding me that no, my worth is because He spoke dignity into my being.

My importance may have came from being busy. Now... I'm absolutely not busy, yet I feel pretty darn good. Slowly pieces are being placed back in my life.

I understand that, it's a season for me because I can't live like this for the rest of my life :p Well, unless the Lord really calls me to and enables me to...

Right now, it's kind of like something is brewing deep within... or for you sciencey people, potential energy is being accumulated for some kinetic energy to be released soon.

Learning to enjoy the journey.

That being said. I think I need to go out now. A friend told me that I'm suppose to meet five new people every week...

Now where do I find five new friends every week???

Looking for friends. Apply within.

video games beneficial...

Driving home this morning, I was getting agitated and a bit miffed... mainly because I was thinking about "mo lew" (non-sense/dumb) things.

Anyway, I was behind a recylcing truck when I was at the height of my agitation...

when...

a 4 litre empty milk jug came straight at my car...!

I had to swerve.

What the!?!?

Just as I got back into the lane, another jug came at me...

I swerved again!

Oh my word!

Then another jug...!

For the next five minutes, my mind was focused on avoiding flying objects. Thankfully I was a student of arcade driving games..!

And I was laughing all the way home.

Thanks Lord for some humour injection...

You always know when I need it :)

Here's some more humour injection... I found this hilarious... but what are they saying about old people though??!?!
Drunk drivers' penalty in Taiwan: Pay fine or play mahjong with the elderly

top word [aren't you lucky, two posts today!]

Miriam Webster's dictionary's top look up for 2005 is this word:

1. integrity

Pronunciation: in-'te-gr&-tE
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English integrite, from Middle French & Latin; Middle French integrité, from Latin integritat-, integritas, from integr-, integer entire
1 : firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values : INCORRUPTIBILITY
2 : an unimpaired condition : SOUNDNESS
3 : the quality or state of being complete or undivided : COMPLETENESS
synonym see HONESTY

Fascinating to know what's on people's minds these days.

Been thinking a lot about this word the last few weeks actually. Wrote a bit about this topic for a school leadership assignment, but aside from that, to me integrity means single-mindedness. Practicing what you preach basically.

I'm learning the value of meaning what you say and saying what you mean.

Integrity.

the room of encouragement

(I wrote this last week... but decided finally to post. Don't you ever do it? Delayed postings..?)

In Bible College, my room was called "the room of encouragement." Natalie and I were the "encouragers" and we were roommates as well. Our room was always filled with people who wanted to hang out or people who needed a bit of "pick-me-ups."

That was almost six years ago...

Now, the lesson's a little deeper...

Learning lots about the value of appreciation.

What a blessing it is to find the thing that would make someone smile and do it.

What a blessing it is to be on the recipient side of receiving a word an act of gratitude.

I don't do this enough. Through words or actions. I just don't. But I'm learning to...

It's about opening the gates and allowing words of life to escape the heart and out through the mouth to bless another person.

If I haven't told you before... I appreciate you. I really do.
I'm saying this based on the fact that I actually know you :)

Maybe it's your smile, maybe it's the quality time spent, maybe it's the gifts you give me, maybe it's the tears shed, maybe it's how you treat others, maybe it's your laughter, maybe it's your "niceness..."

And maybe, just maybe, I'm just beginning to see you the way God sees you.

I appreciate you. You being you.

you've got...

wrinkles.

Yep. Mum just said that to me a few nights ago. Just like mum to tell it to me straight up. Tell it like it is.

I looked in the mirror yesterday and was like "Shelaine, you lookin' bad..."

I think I need a makeover... or something! Help? Someone?

Gotta inject some life back into my face :)

That little "group" that sang that song at my party about wrinkles... it's true... I'm 25 and getting wrinkles. Bah humbug!

Time to take care of myself again.

I was feeling refreshed and good coming home in the summer. Bright-eyed and eyebag-free... Now that the sun is shining, I think me needs to have some sun-time.

why wait?

A quote from a young theologian,

"Psalm 40 tells us that we need to wait and wait and wait as we lament in prayer. For it is in waiting that we permit God the freedom to respond according to His perfect timing and relinquish our desires to take situations into our own hands; in waiting, we look forward to being lifted up from the sinking ground of despair; in waiting, our faith and hope in God is srengthened and formed to His liking; in waiting, our vitality is reawakened, refreshed, and reinvigorated; and in waiting, we enter into thanksgiving in our prayers."

Does this speak to you?

This young theologian is taking donations to pay for his schooling...

Cheques can be sent to my house...

I live with this "young theologian" too!

Props to you, my bro! There's lots I can learn from you... which is precisely why I need to get back to my homework :)

ginger vinegar

(disclaimer to my pastey friends... hehe..)

Yes I have weird tastes.

Ever since I was little and family friends were popping out babies, I'd wait for the time when they call us over to eat "ginger vinegar."

Not many kids like it.. but this one does!

It's like this pig's feet, eggs, and ginger in this black vinegar "sauce"... it can be left for like, months and it's suppose to be good for the mom who just had a baby.

Anyways, my auntie brought over two more pots of this stuff (we already had one) because my cousin just had a baby girl about a month ago. Not sure if I'm more excited about eating the pig's feet and eggs or about the baby girl...

haha..

kidding!

Although, I haven't seen her yet... but I've eaten plenty of the fatty pig's feet!

Am I the only one that has "weird tastes" here???

concert of hope

Went to a "Concert of Hope" at my church... put on by a group called Watoto - an children's choir from Uganda. All the kids were orphaned at one point of time. But now speak of a hope and a love they have received.

One girl said "God healed our hearts. And He gave us peace."

Such a simple truth, yet somehow after being "churched" for too long, we forget it. It's simple, really. God heals hearts and restores it with peace.

Three of the kids stayed at my house for two days. So much fun just chatting and eating... three other boys came over and the six of them put on a show for me at my house.

At the concert I found out what the three boys wanted to be when they grew up.

Hakim, age 11, wants to be President
Douglas, age 9, wants to be a Policeman
Michael, age 9, wants to be a Taxi-driver... yes a taxi-driver!

Yes... in my home represented ambitions to affect all realms of Ugandan society.

These Watoto kids (about 1300 kids in total) are truly the future of Uganda. It makes me wonder what it will look like in say, 10 years... the nation will truly be a changed as each of these children become men and women of godly character, high morality, and leaders of the country and the African continent.

The kids really smile. Like really. Not fake ones.. because even their EYES smile! Here are some pics... I have some more on my camera - but since it's film, I need to take 20 more pics before I develop it! :)

After watching them for two days, I'm encouraged and wanting to SMILE more too... A few of us were sayin, we're put to shame because we don't smile enough!

It's their first time in Canada... or outside of their country. Last week they rode an escalator for the first time... and also an elevator. Freaked them out eh! We take a lot for granted...

new perspectives

A new world.

Wow.

Why did I just discover it?

Goggles.

Yep.

I splurged yesterday... and bought my 20 buck goggles.

My swimming-mates (what do you call them!?) have been bugging me saying what a differences it makes...blah blah...

Anyways, our second last class, I've buy these grey-pink goggles and jump into the water. At first I do as I normally do, and close my eyes while going under only to realize, hey... I can open them now... Ikes!

WOW... what a diff! I can SEE. It really is like being like a fish!

It's lessens the fear of the deep end too... wowsers!

After opening my eyes for the first time underwater, I pop my head out and start laughing like that 7-year old child in me... haha... I think I was beaming. My swimming-mates, these middle-aged women, laughed with me and at my new found enthusiasm...

It's good to be able to see again...

Literally and figuratively...

It really is good to be able to see again...