China Series 1.2 08.08.08 at 8:08pm

The Olympics begin in 1h45 minutes, PST.

Excited?

Maybe if I was in China.

I find it "neat" how the Chinese government can get everyone, seriously, everyone, on the same page. Perhaps that's one of the "positives" of Communism?

On arrival at Beijing International Airport, the Indian team were greeted by volunteers, "with a proper folded-hand 'namaskar' and introduced themselves as Charu, Shanti, Vishnu and Raj Kumar."

I guess names like "Cherry," "Cinderella," and "Sue" (for a boy) are out.

Beijing also has nearly 100,000 volunteers...that's in venues alone. 400,000 volunteers around the veunes, and about 1 million in the communities. Meanwhile 67,000 taxi drivers are donning new yellow (of course) shirts and blue trousers.

Oh and for the non-Chinese, you'll be happy to learn that Beijing has "standardized" their menus. No longer can you order "bean curd made by a pock-marked woman," but need to request "mapao tofu."

PS. "Racist Park" no longer exists. Ask to visit, "Park of Ethnic Minorities."

Cheers,

China Series 1.1 - Civilizing the Chinese

The Chinese Government recently issued the "Eight Don't Ask Questions" list, distributed to their people.

• Don't ask about income or expenses.
• Don't ask about age.
• Don't ask about love, life, or marriage.
• Don't ask about health.
• Don't ask about someone's home or address.
• Don't ask about personal experience.
• Don't ask about religious beliefs or political views.
• Don't ask what someone does.

So what are you allowed to talk about?

The weather.

believing in China?

Has China claimed the title of "god?"

Someone once said, if you have faith, you can move mountains.
Moving mountains proves to be an easy task, look at the Sea to Sky.

Yahweh once rebuked the seas, and they dried up.
China diverted the Yangtze.

The gods have always been associated with dictating the weather.
And the Middle Kingdom's latest claim to "fame"? It will be controlling the weather for the 2008 Beijing Olympics. Yes that's right. The Chinese have triumphed over nature. Prior to the games, they'll clean the polluted city by with rain, shooting "silver iodide over the city's skies" to provoke a chemical reaction.

Speaking about chemicals... does this trigger global warming?

These are my people.

Never have I been more proud. Sarcasm intended.